The ‘Normal One’ rising…..

How long before people start calling him the ‘Rubbish One’ as #JoseMourinho’s shocking season at #Chelsea continued to get worse as the self-proclaimed ‘Normal One’ #JurgenKlopp and his #Liverpool side powered by the brilliant little #Coutinho beat the Blues 1-3 at #StamfordBridge, leaving them rooted to 15th and now 6 defeats into the season. Many felt this game was a make or break for Jose and the next 24 hours might well decide his future. If Roman does fire him, Chelsea will likely owe Mourinho over £20+ million in termination fees. That would be a handsome little cushion to fall on as the #PSG job awaits him and the cynical amongst us would have to wonder how orchestrated this may well be!

#VanGaal and his obstinance continue to hurt the Red Devils as a piss poor #ManchesterUnited were incredibly lucky to come away with a 0-0 draw at #CrystalPalace. #LVG insist on playing #Rooney, who is certainly the worst player in the #EPL this season and gets worse by the game – he’s slow (in the 30th minute the through pass that would have had anyone decent through on goal, was too ‘heavy’ for the slow, fat Rooney to reach), he loses possession more than any other player in the league (an actual fact, not hyperbole), makes more misplaced passes than anyone in the league and more than anything else is played as the central striker, which makes the brilliant #AnthonyMartial play on the left wing and well as he does there, he’s United’s only real potent goal scorer and is thus wasted out wide, the results of which are clear to see – United haven’t scored in 3 games now, breaking an 11 year record!

#Arsenal on the other hand continue their red hot form as goals by #Giroud #Campbell and #Koscielny and some great saves by #Cech gave them a 0-3 away win at #Swansea – the effect #Cech has had on the title run of this Gunners side is incredible and leaves them in 2nd on the table, just behind #ManchesterCity on goal difference after a late #Toure penalty gave them a nervy 2-1 win against a very plucky #NorwichCity. #LeicesterCity and top scorer in the league #Vardy continued their fabulous run with a come-from-behind 2-3 win away at #WestBrom and leapfrogged #WestHam into 3rd after the hammers lost 0-2 away to #Watford.

Over in the #Bundesliga #Bayern finally dropped points in a 0-0 draw at #Frankfurt and #Dortmund’s 1-3 win away at #WerderBremen brought the title “race” to within 5 points, such is the one sided nature of the German domestic season.

#RealMadrid beat #LasPalmas 3-1 to go 3 clear of #Barcelona (for now) as the Catalans play their game against #Getafe shortly.

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Who’s the Specialist In Failure, now?

#Arsene’s boys have now beaten #ManchesterUnited 3-0, #BayernMunich 2-0 and today, #Everton 2-1 in their last 3 games and are now top of the #EPL table and will remain there this game week if United are able to conjure an upset against visiting #ManCity tomorrow. That’s in sharp contrast to the fortunes of Arsene’s tormentor-in-chief, #JoseMourinho, who’s season has gone from really bad to incredibly worse after a fabulous #WestHam (now 2nd in the table!) beat 10-man #Chelsea 2-1 to send them to their 5th defeat of the season and to 14 places below the Gunners. To make matters worse, #Mourinho has made more enemies than there are available and has created an extremely unhealthy atmosphere around him and his club, which is a genuine disservice to a set of players who aren’t half as bad as their results show. #Fabregas may just have been onside (although debatable) for his disallowed goal and #Matic needlessly had himself sent off for 2 silly yellows but by getting himself sent to the stands and refusing to talk to the press, Mourinho is merely isolating himself further and if #Roman’s history is anything to go by, an expensive termination may not be far away, given their poor #ChampionsLeague results to boot.

#LeicesterCity continued their incredible run with a hard-fought 1-0 win over #CrystalPalace thanks to yet another #Vardy goal, his 10th of the season, popping into 5th, while #Watford (0-2 winners over #stoke), #Swansea (1-2 winners at #Villa – this might well be #Sherwood’s last game as coach) and #WestBrom (0-1 winners at #Norwich) all pulled off vital wins as the #EPL goes into the big Mancunian derby tomorrow.

Over in the #Bundesliga, Bayern recovered from their 0-2 loss at Arsenal midweek to thrash #Cologne 4-0 with goals from the returning #Robben #Vidal #Lewandowski and #Muller, highlighting just how much easier their local competition has become for them and why it is a genuine disservice for everyone! In the #LaLiga, the two at the top of the table #RealMadrid and #CeltaVigo (yes, you read that right, Celta is 2nd) Los Blancos won 1-3 thanks to goals by #Cristiano (obviously) #Danilo and #Marcelo and some inspired goal-keeping by #Navas, who has performed brilliantly all thorough that #DeGea saga and should be trusted to be their long-term No. 1 in goal. Knowing RealMadrid though, that would be far too simple.

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72% possession, 0% incision, 0 mph, same DNA?

#ManchesterUnited and #BayernMunich could well have been interchangeable over the past 2 days – both played away games, both dominated possession (high 70’s!), both were slow and dreary and both made very few chances. This kind of performance is now becoming common-place with #VanGaal’s United but watching Die Rote play like they did reminds one of the worst of #Barcelona – hours and hours of possession with not much else to go with it.
#CSKA were lucky to come away with a 1-1 draw in Moscow against the Red Devils because they were genuinely poor but #Arsenal pulled off a masterstroke of a counter-attacking performance as they converted their measly 27% possession (#Arsene has finally learned that he can win games without controlling them against opponents like United and Bayern to devastating success in a matter of 2 weeks) into a much needed 2-0 home win against the Bavarians with goals from #Giroud and #Ozil. #Cech made the saves one expects, to keep Bayern at bay but the save that #Neuer made from #Walcott’s header has to be the save of the decade. If only he hadn’t flapped at the cross that gave Arsenal their first goal late into the game, he might have had the perfect game. Instead, the Gunners came away with an unexpected, unlikely and exceedingly impressive smash-and-grab win that has been so uncharacteristic of this team.

In contrast, United were just painful to watch. Slow, mechanical and unimaginative (#Martial is the only exception to this – his performances have been nothing short of stunning every game he plays, including today’s headed equalizer) especially the utterly useless #WayneRooney, who seems surprisingly immune from criticism from just about anyone. He can’t score, has very little movement, cannot pass and loses the ball almost every time it’s given to him.

The other side of Manchester however, is loaded with exciting talent, like the fabulous #DeBruyne who’s last minute goal gave them a much needed 2-1 win over visiting #Sevilla and it would be a miracle if United win this weekend’s Manchester derby against the Blues.

In the marquee match of the day, the 2 biggest ego’s in football, #Zlatan and #Ronaldo took on each other in Paris as #PSG and #RealMadrid played out a very fun 0-0 draw inspite of the fire power both sides boasted. For the neutrals this was very entertaining. #Chelsea’s poor season continued as they could only play out a 0-0 draw at #DynamoKiev and #Mourinho continued his battle against the world with his scathing criticism of the referee and could now face a fine from #UEFA as well. If he’s trying to get himself sacked from Chelsea, he’s doing a very good job of it. Regardless of the success he brought them last year, it must be embarrassing for a Chelsea fan to see the whiny, broody, snarky Mourinho walk around behaving like the world hates him. (He might be right come to think of it)

#Barcelona won a routine 2-0 game against #BATE thanks to a brace by #Rakitic and in the game of the round, #Leverkusen and #Roma played out a topsy turvy end-to-end 4-4 draw that was far more fun to watch than the excruciating 72% of mind-numbing possession by the Mancunian and Bavarian boys in red!

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The King of Madrid!

324 goals in an astonishing 310 games means that #CristianoRonaldo is now the highest goalscorer for #RealMadrid, after scoring the second in their 3-0 win at home to visiting #Levante, thereby eclipsing the 323 goals that the legendary #Raul hit for them, albeit in 741 games.

Over in the #EPL, after the hammering #ManchesterUnited received at #Arsenal in the last game, a visit to high-flying #Everton would have seemed the worst possible game for the Red Devils to try and bounce back from, but a combination of #Holland’s shocking exit from the Euro, (which finally meant that #LVG dropped the terrible #Depay and the efficient yet slow #Blind for fit again #Jones and the talented and technically gifted #AnderHerrera) and some solid defensive support from the brilliant #DeGea and the suddenly-amazing #Smalling, meant that United came away with a comfortable 0-3 victory and kept them in 3rd. Herrera always delivers something every game he gets to play – a goal, an assist, creativity, movement. Why Van Gaal does not play him more is hard to understand.

Their noisy neighbors, driven on by a #Sterling hattrick put 5 past a hapless #Bournemouth to win 5-1 at home and ensuring that #ManchesterCity stay 2 clear at the top. #Chelsea meanwhile trudged their way to a much needed 2-0 win over #Villa thanks to a #DiegoCosta goal and a #Hutton own-goal, giving #Mourinho a little breathing room and bringing them up to 11th on the table.

#JurgenKlopp’s debut at #Liverpool ended in a good 0-0 draw away to #Tottenham and for the Reds, a start that they won’t complain too much about, what with them running more in this game than any other team this season, showing Klopp’s famous ‘Gegenpress’ is already up and running. #AlexisSanchez continued his fine goalscoring form for #Arsenal (and #Chile) as he, #Giroud and #Ramsey  gave the Gunners a 0-3 win away at a battling #Watford, pushing them back into 2nd.

A #Zlatan brace gave #PSG a 0-2 win at #Bastia, sending them a whole 8 points clear at the top of the #Ligue1 and at this early stage the title looks already won, much like in the #Bundesliga, where #BayernMunich took a battling 3 points in a 0-1 win away at #WerderBremen, moving them 7  points clear of #Dortmund, who beat #Mainz 0-2 to remain in second.

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Who’s next?

Just as blow-hot-blow-cold #Arsenal had finished demolishing an absolutely listless, lifeless, senseless #ManchesterUnited side 3-0 at the #Emirates, thanks to a 15 minute blitz by the amazing #Sanchez and company, with #Rooney finding a way to play even worse than he has for the past 18 months, if that was even possible, and the likes of #Young #Depay and #Carrick doing little more than occupying (very little) space on the pitch in a team selection by a stubborn and often clueless coach that continues to baffle, the news came through that #BrendanRodgers was the first to go as coach this season. (Well, after #DickAdvocaat quit at #Sunderland) That he was in the firing line as stuttering #Liverpool’s Manager was well known – that it would come so quickly after the Reds played out a 1-1 derby draw against #Everton. If rumors are to be believed, then either of #JurgenKlopp (it almost seems wasteful that the heir apparent to the #BayernMunich throne would waste that opportunity on Liverpool) or #CarloAncelotti (he’s a classy tactician who plays attractive football and stays away from the needless whining and fighting that the likes of #Mourinho and #Wenger seem to revel in) will take over as head coach – both of whom will find it exceedingly hard to guarantee a top 4 finish for this Liverpool side. Mourinho seems safe at #Chelsea – for now, but another couple of negative results and the blues most successful coach will be packing his bags (again), collecting a handsome severance and relaxing in Setúbal as he awaits the inevitable PSG job in July.

#Tottenham had to rely on 2 brilliant #ChristianEriksen free-kicks to salvage a 2-2 draw at #Swansea after a comical #HarryKane own goal gave the swans the lead. Once good ‘ol Harry starts finding the net on the other side of the pitch, this Spurs side is going to do just fine.

Mighty Bayern showed why they are back to being the best team in Europe again after they demolished nearest rivals #Dortmund 5-1 at the #AllianzArena. In this form, #RealMadrid and #Barcelona appear way inferior to the Bavarian giants, with Real conceding late in the Madrid derby to draw 1-1 at #Atletico and waste the chance to go top of the #LaLiga, while in France, the #Zlatan scored 2 penalties to break #Pauletta’s record for most goals scored for #PSG as they beat #Marseille 2-1.

#InterMilan dropped off the top of the #SerieA after a 1-1 draw at #Sampdoria combined with #Fiorentina’s 3-0 thrashing of #Atalanta pushed the Viola to the top of the table with impressive wins for #Napoli and #Juventus rounding out the weekend.

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The end is nigh?

Just as the magnificent #SergioAguero was banging in a record-breaking 5 goals in #ManchesterCity’s thumping 6-1 thrashing of poor ‘ol #NewcastleUnited at the #Etihad, sending them back to the top of the table, (#United can go back top if they win at #Arsenal tomorrow), the complete disintegration that has been underway at reigning champions #Chelsea took a turn for the worse as a fabulous #Southampton came from a #Willian goal behind to thrash the Blues at the Bridge 1-3, thanks to excellent goals by man-of-the-math #SaidoMane, #Pelle and #Davis. If the 4th defeat in 8 games, equalling their worst start ever (the last time this happened they were relegated) wasn’t bad enough, the post match interview by #Mourinho was a bizarre monologue of blaming referees, challenging the powers-that-be *cough* Roman Abramovich *cough* to sack him since he’s the greatest coach they’ve ever had and general whining that suggests that not only are things not kosher behind the scenes, there must have been conversations around the ‘sack’ word that has rattled the special one. Expect news to come out of #StamfordBridge over the next few weeks if this continues, what with Chelsea sitting in 16th, just 2 above the drop zone.

#CrystalPalace continued their fantastic start to the season with a 2-0 win over #WestBrom  to go into 3rd on the table. Poor #TonyPulis – he might be in a race with #SteveMcClaren at Newcastle, #TimSherwood at #AstonVilla (they lost again – 0-1 at home to visiting #Stoke), #Rodgers at #Liverpool (especially if they lose the derby to #Everton tomorrow) and the big one – Mourinho, for the first to get sacked this season. #Leicester won away at #Norwich 1-2 to slot into 4th (who would have thought that 8 games into the season?) and #WestHam came from 2 goals down to draw 2-2 at beleaguered #Sunderland, keeping them at 5th in the table.

The big upset of the day came in the #LaLiga as #Sevilla beat the visiting Catalan giants 2-1 highlighting #Barcelona’s defensive weaknesses this season and their dependence on the injured #Messi, a combination of which could allow #Real to put some distance in this title race if they can win their next 4 games, while Messi is out injured, starting with the big one – tomorrow’s Madrid derby!

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